On the Internet, news travels fast so you probably know all that's worth knowing about this figure. Yep. This is The One that bunches of people have been waiting impatiently for, ever since it was rumoured from Toy Fair that Evil Genius Toys would be producing Playboy's Playmates. The pictures looked fabulous. Details were fuzzy at the time over matters like what scale they would be, who would distribute them, how much they'd cost, and how the articulation would be. To the disappointment of many a Joehead, it became clear fairly early that this would be a 1:4 scale doll. But it would be reasonably priced. It was rumored that the figure would sport a wondrous realistic flesh over an armature, with the larger scale allowing a closer approximation of Reality than the soft skinned 12" dolls from Jakks Pacific. From that time until now, very few additional details were available except that instead of Karen McDougal, their first release would be Victoria Silvstedt. (I was bummed since I'm partial to dark-haired ladies... and I'm sure you're glad that I shared that with you.) If you have any idea of scale, you already know that 1:4 scale isn't remotely Joe-sized. So there shouldn't be any surprises about the way she towers over the Dragon figure in the picture. Obviously, no Joe or Klaus would ever be man enough for her. On all other accounts, don't blame Playboy. Rumors, being rumors, don't always pan out. Certain assessments are very subjective: Claims of "soft skin" are fuzzy. "Soft" compared to what? A bowling ball? Unless you get the Shore-A/D hardness specification, you don't know what "soft" means. My first instinct after checking under the bra (yep, thar's a painted nipple down thar) was to flex her leg to test the articulation. Kinda stiff. Actually, the whole leg bent, kinda like there wasn't any articulation at all! Indeed, if you want to call it articulation, it's mainly in the way that a hollow cast vinyl statue's limbs can be bent. They don't hold a pose. And if you insist that I spell it out for you, this is a vinyl statue wearing doll clothes. It's not an articulated, poseable doll.

If you ordered this not knowing that, you might be a little peeved. However, before you target the Playboy mansion with your cruise missiles, you might stop and think about where you picked up your expectations. Chances are, Playboy.com didn't mislead you. There were subtle clues from the beginning: rumors of a reasonably priced 1:4 flesh covered articulated doll? Things that sound too good to be true usually are. I expect that there will be an uproar about this since it was unexpected. I expect that there will be an inordinate amount of whining and bellyaching over this. Those who bought first without knowing what they were getting have mainly themselves to blame (but unfortunately, rarely see it that way). You can just look at it as a neat 1:4 scale figure, the beginning of a new collection. For your money you get a well-sculpted vinyl figure complete with those special naughty details. (Although the lower zone ain't too graphically special-- which is good by my reckoning, since it shows that there are still some boundaries of civility. But if you're really desperate for features, you can consider the squeeze-waist-for-fartsound to be an undocumented action feature.) The bathrobe with the embossed Playboy logo pattern is very cool (material clearly was specially made for these figures), as is the necklace with a bunny charm on it. You also get a black, round-based stand with a silver vacuum metalized nameplate (Yes-- she needs the base to stand reliably). The packaging is also very attractive-- white box with logo on front (top pic) with the familiar Playboy Data Sheet on the back. And of course, an official Certificate of Authenticity (woo-hoo). Finally, and I don't know if this is a regular inclusion or not, they threw in a magazine of real life bunnies, "Playboy's Nudes". (I was kinda surprised that they came in sizes that small, nyuk, nyuk) I wish there were more to say about this. I've only put up a few pictures because there's really not that much to show, unless you want to see where they put her production seams (legs, arms & head). With a sculpture, you can replicate human anatomy very faithfully, and you probably already know what a naked Playmate looks like. If you're really curious, I'm sure that pictures of her private parts will available on other websites. Vinyl statue or not, I think it's a neat idea. Hopefully, if the idea sells they may eventually get around to doing my favorite from waaaaaay back, Janet Lupo... uhhhh... as she looked back then! Maybe sometime in the next 20 years or so...

--10/18/01

 

10/19/01- A NAKED PIC, BELOW:
I'm yielding to demand to show the aforementioned private parts, although I'm a little amused by the perception that this is a "show it all" kinda website. Actually, on the balance, there are very few finished, painted nipple pics in this site! The opportunities to show that kind of detail far outnumber the actual instances of it. Granted, the overall feel of the site is permissive and liberal, with a good deal of that due to the text and innuendo. With regard to boobs and sexuality, I believe that the hint or suggestion of it is far more powerful than plopping some naked titflesh out in front of you and saying "Look!"... That just isn't my idea of "sexy", and I feel that it's true of the picture below-- I prefer her scantily-clothed look. Well... whatever torques your nuts...